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00:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
01:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
02:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
03:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
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Smiling & holding aloft a glass of wine
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Brother. I've got to try to get some SLEEP.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Sincerely)
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O, my sweet system! O, my Virtual Confderence Room of Tomorrow!
To thou tonight I abase myself with such devotion!. Really, please please support me, support what
we have together, try Everything in youR POEWR, omy sweet system, to appeal to our clients. I have
sacrificewd so much for you. Tonight I had a nother spat with my wife, she does't understand that
the time I spend with you wil benefit HER also, and the child, but NO she can't SEE that. O, my sweet
little system I visualize us united at last aboard our Private Jet with our stewardesses with uniforms
the same color as the BOX you come in, O my program, O my code, a color that has become as famous as our famous Brand Identity
and I'm flying to New YOjrk to be interviewed for TEELVEIVISION, and I will sit there on the set
with you in your box beside me, o please let this client buy you, o please oplease.
ERASE MESSAGE
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SAINT-CYR
(Enthusiastically)
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Peels face away from computer screen
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A pleasant good midnight to you, sir.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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ERASE PREVIOUS MESSAGE ERASE
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k! Hel lo good morning. Glad to see you're
wor working tonight! Good for you! Has Anna gone to sleep?
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JOAN
(Secret Note to SAINT-CYR)
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To bed, maybe --- but not to sleep.
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SAINT-CYR
(Smoothly)
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Anna and Paul are taking a breake, sir.
They shall return anon.
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04:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
05:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
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PAUL
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Smoking a fine Turkish cigarette and staring at the sunrise
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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I don't know how it is for you, Joan . . .
but I've always been in the wacky habit of somehow connecting SEX with INTIMACY . . . [silly me]
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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And instead --- 'WHAT' happened --- in this
instance?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Arrgh . . . Well . . . 'Yo, ho, ho' . . . um . . .
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Imagine a fortified Spanish Galleon, we'll call
her . . . oh, say . . . the Anna . . . pulling into Hotel Cove with the privateer Paulio in (ridiculously) hot
purfuit . . .
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She walks into my room and stops and stares
at my suitcase stuff with the weirdest expression on her face . . . like it was cat vomit or something . . .
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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I've seen her pull that expression.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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So . . . nervous as they are, the crew of
the Paulio manages to raise a fairly loud cry and swing manly-ly into the rigging of the Anna
. . . sabres brandished . . . without getting too terribly tangled . . . there were some of the usual logistical struggles
getting the Anna's sails removed . . .
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And a weird discussion about whether to leave
the curtains open or not
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JOAN
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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She voted 'Curtains Open,' right? Just a guess.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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. . . but by the time the Paulio's crew
alights on the Anna's bare deck . . . the are faced with a terrifying fact . . . they have boarded
a Ghost Ship! . . . there is no Crew, no Captain . . . the Paulio's men rush to the hatch of the
treasure hold . . . to find it not even locked . . . the hold opens automatically, casually . . . just a bunch
of cold yellow metal in there, blah, blah, blah . . . 'come on in, fellas . . . take what you want
. . . whatever' . . .
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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. . . So I rushed
up to the Crow's Nest with a spyglass to look for the rowboat containing the Captain and Crew . . . but, nay
. . . only empty horizons . . .
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Well --- there is usually
--- um --- a gunpowder keg situated near the Treasure Hold --- Did ye Paulio's crew pay
sufficient attention to yon Powder Keg?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Yon powder keg was in no way neglected by
the stout crew of ye Paulio . . . it being a not ENTIRELY inexperienced crew, thank you . . .
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And like: NO eye contact. Ever.
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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So there was no explosion aboard the Anna?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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For centuries, historians have debated: "Was
there an explosion aboard the Anna? . . . and the sad thing is that it seemed kind of beside-the-point
at the moment . . . TO THE ABSENT CREW OF THE ANNA, I mean . . .
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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And did the Paulio's men ever
fire their muskets?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Musket-fire? Isn't that a bit . . . personal?
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Well, tell the captain of the Paulio
not to worry. I'm sure he'll find plenty of galleons on the high seas willing to beat him off and defend their gold
with their last ounce of --- um --- I mean --- waiting to blow him unto smithereens with their Powder
--- that is to say --- er --- Tell him not to let one Ghost Ship spoil the whole fleet --- oh --- He'll know what I mean!
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06:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
07:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
08:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
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Smiling & holding aloft a glass of WINE
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Aww, keerist, where is everybody!
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SAINT-CYR
(Longsufferingly)
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JOAN
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Oh, wine first thing in the morning, Dick? . . . good . . . yes . . . pass the wine
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PAUL
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Weary, bleary, disoriented, Paul was just having had the
weirdest dream that he was in Chicago . . . hey . . . HEY . . . he IS in Chicago . . . at Joan's desk . . .
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ANNA
(Enthusiastically)
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Dick, we got a ton done overnight.
The whole team really pulled together and we're ready to go.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Where the dag are your costume images?!! WEVerybody
needs to be wearing your costume images!
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SAINT-CYR
(Medievally)
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Aye, an't were like unto a dream . . .
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JOAN
(Piratically)
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Arrgh. A pleasante goode morninge to ye.
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PAUL
(Empirically)
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Low flourishin . . . er . . . floundering bow . . .
gets his hat plume entangled in his sword.
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Alack and abaft ye mateys! Arrgh! 'Tis an ill wind that blows in these tights.
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Struggles, staggers, sbum tles, er, stum bles
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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GLda to hear it, Anna! Don't want to make anyone
nervous but this is the most important meeting of your life. I hope to heckg we don't screw it up.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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Hides behind a single, long stemmed rose, whispers to Anna
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good morning, special one
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ANNA
(Enthusiastically)
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All the main pages of the prototype are ready
for them to look at on-line, but we still have placeholders on a lot of the wine pages. We're so close,
people, let's not wimp out now!
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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I was so close so close to real CONTACT with Anna!
I shouldn't wimp out now, right?
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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You sure Anna CONTACT is what you really want?
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SAINT-CYR
(Secret Note to ANNA; SAINT-CYR; PAUL)
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I think that's one of Dick's best pep talks EVER.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Yes, absolutely! Yes, Anna! No wimping out!
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Hm . . . Joan asks a tough question
. . . Makes an interesting point . . .
hmmmmm . . .
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(EnthusiasticallyEnthusiasticallyEnthusiastically)
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REMEBMER --- High Energy during the Meeting --- sel sell sell sell!
and no more clowining around with description lines, dagnm it!!!
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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I can't believe you have no COFFEE
down here in your silly little St. Louis office! What kind of two-byte, rinky-dink,
fly-by-night outfit is this?
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09:00 hours CST (Daylight savings time in effect)
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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But my dear, you know EXACTLY what kind
of two-byte, rinky-dink, fly-by-night outfit this is.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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Blowing softly into the single red rose he holds
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Hello? Test! Test! Is this thing on?
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Paul, let's get as many images done as we can before the presentation, all right?
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Where the frigk are they? They should bbe here bbby now!
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Secret Note to ANNA, SAINT-CYR, JOAN, PAUL)
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Was that public? Do you think he saw it?
Get evberybody quick!!! I hear them all in the lunchroom get them!!!
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SAINT-CYR
(Enthusiastically)
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A pleasant good morning to you, Mr. Nakano.
Anna and the team will be here MOMENTARILY. I trust you had no problem signing on.
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SAINT-CYR
(Secret Note to ANNA; PAUL; JOAN)
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Ahem. Where IS everybody? I'm a tech/person, not
a presentation/person. Help.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Mr. Nakano, hello! We have a great presentation
for you this morning. The team has been done a lot of great work and I KNOW you'll be impressed!!!
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NAKANO_GUEST
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What's with the stupid hats?
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JOAN
(Enthusiastically)
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Good morning, Mr. Nakano!
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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I'll explain ALL ABOVT the historical
imagery concpept in just a moment, when Mr. Vanacek gets here.
Striking image isn't it?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA; SAINT-CYR; JOAN)
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Striking? Striking? I know I'D STRIKE ME
if I saw me dressed like this!
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PAUL
(Spectacularly)
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Good Morning, Mr. Nakano! Heigh ho!
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SAINT-CYR
(Enthusiastically)
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Good morning, Mr. Vanacek!
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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A most munificent Good Morning to you, sir!
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PAUL
(Enthusiastically)
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Good Morning, Mr. Vanacek.
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ANNA
(Enthusiastically)
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Shaking Mr. Vanacek's hand warmly
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How good to see you! I have a lot
of exciting things to show you this morning I think you'll really be excited about.
If you're all settled in and would like to open a second window on your screen,
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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I'll take it from here Anna!
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Good Messers Nakano and Vanacek! Welcome
to the Wor'ds Best Virtual Conference Room of Tomorrow! I'd like to begin by conjuring an image in your minds.
----INSERT PREPARED TEXT--------
Imagine a Burgundian Knight, by the light of a winter fire, having found refuge at a small castle . . .
snow howls outside . . . the daughter of the castle's eyes sparkle from inside her demure hood . . .
they lift a glass of Hearty Burgundy, available now at WineSpeculatory for a mere . . .
---END PREPARED TEXT------
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SAINT-CYR
(Secret Note to ANNA; PAUL; JOAN)
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HeLLO! Anna? What's going on here?
I'm frightened. Aren't YOU running this meeting?
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VANACEK_GUEST
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Imagine a businessman
sitting in his pyjamas early in the morning at his home office
getting angry at his web designer
for wasting his f*cking time!
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL; SAINT-CYR; JOAN)
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I THOUGHT I was running this meeting, but evidently not . . .
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Yes, yes . . . I can see that, Mr. Vanacek . . . but the businessman in pyjamas
scenario doesn't have the ZING of the Burgundian Knight story to me . . .
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA; SAINT-CYR; JOAN)
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Arrrgh, lads and lassies! Hang on to yer bilge!
Ye seas be gettin' rough!
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VANACEK_GUEST
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Nakano!
Why are they wearing stupid hats?
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Anna picks up the red tablcloth and places it slowly back on the table.
She relights one candlabra. She pulls her shawl from her shoulders and folds it into a pillow which
she places on the table. She lies down on the table and looks softly at Paul.
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JOAN
(Earnestly)
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Mr. Vanacek, wouldst thou be pleased to entertain
another notion regarding ye webbe site?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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No imagination needed, Anna! Paul for-real brings his real shirt to his lips
and for-real smells your for-real perfume rubbed off in a real hotel room only a few short for-real hours ago
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Imagines his lips
tracing slow progress, vertebra by vertebra, down her naked spine.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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Standing in the middle of train-of-thought tracks,
waving blaze orange sweatshirt, mouthing wildly STOP STOP
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Hello, Anna! . . . You Who! . . . I am sitting
in the next room RIGHT NOW! I have a key in my pocket to a hotel room which's checkout time is noon!
And, though it's nice, as always, to read what you're imagining . . . what's going on in REALITY, here? I'm beginning
to get a little weirded out.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Joan! Joan! She's flirting with me again in a very
chaste, pre-consummation, kind of way!
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Sounds like you haven't popped her mental cherry.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Thanks for the 'mental cherry' image.
That'll be showing up in some nightmares . . . Anna's being
so creepy
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Jesus will you stop thinking about everything so much.
You're wrecking it.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Well then . . . igmagine a busines meeting
of medieval burgermeisters . . . they seal the oaths on a prosperous new contract by lifting high . . . a glistening glass of wine!!!
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Now she says I'm "wrecking it" by "thinking too much."
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Guys! Always thinking with their --- um --- minds.
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Look, Paul, you're a sweet man, but I've got a lot going on
in my life right now and I don't really need the hassle of someone who's trying to
get into my head all the time
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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I thought I was already in your head . . .
I thought now
it was a matter of comfortably entering your pants . . . Anyway I LIKE sharing head-insides . . .
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
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Or a jolly customs-house with the jolly
customs agent being bribed by a rotund happy merchant with a cask of FINE WINE!!!!
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ANNA
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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You won't like what you see inside my head.
I'm poison. All I do is hurt people.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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She says "I'm poison," She says "All I do
is hurt people"
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
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Considers saying "I told you so;" decides against it
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I'd be inclined to take the woman at her word.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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Likes what he sees in Anna. Sees a sweet person who's
been hurt, that's all.
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I'd like to see more of you, Anna.
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ANNA
(Enthusiastically)
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You don't see shit! And you know, let's keep it that way!
I just don't have time for this shit. Last night was fun and blah blah blah, but let's fucking
forget about it, OK?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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Anna? Wait! What hap . . . did I blow it?
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
|
Paul seems to have been broken up with
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'Yo ho ho' . . . I guess . . . right, Joan? . . . shit!
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VANACEK_GUEST
|
Anna, that got my attention. Go on.
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ANNA
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You just leave me and my ideas alone!
Take your reality and shove it! The only thing that makes this piss hole bearable is pretending. People
want an esthetic --- that's what romance is about, that's what what wine is about, that's what financial fucking speculation is about.
You're pushing temporary pain relief! Don't try to overthink it.
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JOAN
(Secret Note to ANNA)
|
Um --- Anna? Did you intend that to be ---
a, well --- Secret Note?
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SAINT-CYR
(Secret Note to PAUL; JOAN)
|
To the lifeboats! Geeks first!
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PAUL
(Secret Note to ANNA)
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Anna-yay! Ot-nay in Ublic-pay!
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
|
Mr. Vanacheck, Anna's been under a lot of
stress latelly!!!
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
|
Joan? . . .
What kind of asshole am I? . . . One night of
passion with me sends a woman over the brink!
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VANACEK_GUEST
(Happy)
|
See, I GET it when SHE says it!
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
|
Darling boy, you are an amazing person.
Eminently lovable. I can testify to that from --- personal experience.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
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Gulping, wet-eyed, looking with astonishment at Joan
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VANACEK_GUEST
(Feeling Much Better)
|
I feel much better about this.
Anna, why don't
you take the lead and develop a prototype based on this no-bullsh*t, "pain relief" approach.
BUT, FAST!
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ANNA
(Secret Note to DICK; PAUL; SAINT-CYR; JOAN)
|
Dick? That's it. I QUIT! I've had it.
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RICHARD L. "DICK" EVERETT, PRES.
(Enthusiastically)
|
Lifts a congratulatory glass of WINE!!!!
|
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Nice going, Aanna! I've got a great team here, Mr.
Vanacek!!!
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
|
Joan, you're an awesome person yourself . . . Um . . . when are your
flight times? . . . Any chance our paths will cross at St. Louis airport, or at Chicago O'Hare ?
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ANNA
(Realistically)
|
Great, Mr. Vanacek. Glad you're happy
with the . . . new approach. You won't regret letting us develop it.
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ANNA
(Secret Note to DICK; PAUL; SAINT-CYR; JOAN)
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
|
Cancel that reservation.
Joan! Stay in St. Louis for the weekend! I've got to be back in
St. Louis anyway!
You can crash at my place!
|
|
Paul imagines Joan and Paul in a deliciously tacky
honeymoon motel room in the Poconos replete with split-level champgagne-glass shaped BATHTUB . . .
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JOAN
(Secret Note to PAUL)
|
Can't stay! I've gotta be back in Chicago!
Cousin's wedding tomorrow. Rehearsal
dinner tonight.
|
|
Joan has actually SEEN those Poconos motel rooms!
Laughs. Wearing nothing but her tall medieval hat, Joan scrambles up the carpeted stairs and slides
into the BUBBLY clear tub. She holds her hand out to invite Paul in.
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PAUL
(Secret Note to JOAN)
|
Paul dives headlong into the tub . . . the last
Joan sees of him is his skindiving flippers vanishing 'neath the suds . . . until she feels a sudden . . .
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|
Well . . . I guess . . . meet me here, then! We'll write!
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